We are the music makers; we are the dreamers of dreams

Penicillin is amazing!

My soccer team beat the team I coached last year tonight. It was our first win all season; it was their worst loss all season. I am so proud of them. This must be what parents feel when their kids do something big and important.


Damn, I'm so married to my job.

Day 4: 4.5 miles and a French Riviera Spa membership.

Day 3: 4.4 miles in 1 hour. (This was yesterday, but I was too tired to do anything last night.)


I'm using this as my accountability from now until the marathon the first weekend of December. I feel guilty that I probably won't have time to run tonight, but I do need to take some time to rest and recuperate. Just not too much time.

So, when I said I was training for a marathon, why did none of my friends tell me I was an idiot and I would hurt more on day 2 than I have ever hurt in my life?! Muscles I didn't even know were affected by running are sore right now. And I'll be back on the treadmill tomorrow.

Day 1: 4 miles in 60 minutes.
Day 2: 20 minutes on eliptical. 3.2 miles in 50 minutes.

youthvillages5k.com

April 18. I cannot wait! I just ran 4 miles in an hour. I can shave some time off my mile in 3 weeks. I'm excited. A teacher I work with has convinced me to do the St. Jude marathon with her in December. 26.2 miles is a flippin' long distance to drive and I'm going to run that?! WTF am I thinking?? But she's older than me and has 2 kids and is running this. I can do it.

Only 8 weeks until school is out for the year. Saying I'm done mentally and physically is probably an understatement. Soccer ends next Tuesday night. Dance tryouts are the week of the 5k. State tests are May 12-14. Finals are the next week. Next Friday is a break. Yeah, this year is over.

I hate this weather and what it does to my sinuses and allergies. I'd really like to quit sneezing. That would make me smile.

I just found out that the church I sometimes attend is going to plant a huge garden on like an acre of land they just bought! I am so excited and wanting dirt in my fingers and toes!!!! I hate that they're just now starting to get it all together though. It seems like it's kinda late to be planting some stuff, but I have no idea. I've never worked a garden before. Rachelle, any help or advice?? You're my gardening pro friend. :)

I'm at a really great place in my life again. Finally! All kinds of stuff still feels somewhat unresolved, but I'm not stressing over any of it or any of the people involved in it anymore. I am rediscovering that no one is worth all those tears and all that stress and that I deserve only good things in my life. I am also working on starting a new phase of my life. I have been feeling pulled toward working with the homeless here in my area. I'm sure it has something to do with hanging with Lauren last weekend and talking with some of my dad's homeless friends Friday and also just trying to get outside myself again. I have no idea what I might be getting myself into, but I'm ready for it. It will be fun and hopefully will help people which is really what this life is all about: Have a good time and help as many as you can.

I spend too much time inside my own head.

I plan on telling my principal today that I'm leaving at the end of the year. I am really scared but know he will understand. At least I hope he will understand. I know he can't fire me or take soccer away from me at this point. I think it just feeds into my huge fear of disappointing people. This is also scary because I haven't even finished my application anywhere or have any idea of what I want to do next. I know where I would like to go, but I haven't taken any real steps to get there yet. I've just got to get out of here now or I'll be stuck here the rest of my life.

I know I'm overreacting, but why would you say that? Or send that? Please don't be like every other guy out there. Please just be me having a long week and reading too much into things.

Now I'm going to cry myself to sleep over something totally stupid.

I have become more than a little obsessed with freerice.com. Seriously, go there and answer questions in just about any topic and help feed folks. I plan to take my kids there at some point (or several points) this semester to get them ready for MCTs in May.

I watched the movie The Boys of Baraka earlier tonight and had to fight back the tears. I know it's probably because I'm just extra emotional right now, but that movie really struck a nerve with me. If you get the chance, I encourage you to watch it and all the bonus features that go along with it. It didn't make this job search process I'm going through any easier, but it was eye opening.

I think I'm going to talk to my boss next week about not coming back next year. That has me more scared than anything else I've dealt with the past few months.

I leave for New York in less than 24 hours.

Learn To Be Quiet
Franz Kafka


You need not do anything.
Remain sitting at your table and listen.
You need not even listen, just wait.
You need not even wait,
just learn to be quiet, still and solitary.
And the world will freely offer itself to you unmasked.
It has no choice, it will roll in ecstasy at your feet.

List ten songs you are into right now. No matter what the genre,whether they have words, or even if they're not any good, but that must be songs you're really enjoying right now. Post these instructions in your blog along with your ten songs. Then tag ten other people to see what they're listening to.



Here are my answers: (in no particular order)

1. "Creep" - Scala's cover of Radiohead. I had chills the first time I heard it.
2. "The Story" - Brandi Carlile.
3. "Paper Planes" - MIA. Maybe it's because the gunshots in the song remind me of the gunshots I heard at my apt last night.
4. "What You Want" - John Butler Trio. Always on my list of favorite songs.
5. "O'Rourke's, 1:20 a.m." - The Good Life
6. "Whatever You Like" - T.I.
7. "Music is my Boyfriend" - CSS. Because music really is my hot, hot sex.
8. "Sex on Fire" - Kings of Leon
9. "California" - Metro Station. I listened to this song as we landed in Cali a few weeks ago.
10. "Love Always Remains" - MGMT. I think they're from Memphis which makes them awesome.

http://www.oldamericancentury.org/14pts.htm

Apparently, my stress can cause my headaches. I have a super bad one right now. I didn't think I was really that stressed, but I could be wrong. My dreams are still super weird and borderline scary. I had one a few weeks ago that I told a few people about. I'm so glad I told them, because I just finished reading a book that had a scene that was very similar to my dream. Not exactly the same but close enough that I almost called my dad at 1 in the morning to tell him about it. I had never read this book or even knew about its existence until 2 weeks ago and I didn't start reading it until Wednesday or Thursday. I was trying to make myself not remember my dreams because they wre so weird. Now, I'm going to make sure I remember them.

Speaking of...zzz

yep.

This cold or whatever it is I have is kicking my butt! I had to leave work during 2nd period today because I felt so bad. I hope I feel better tomorrow because I'm going to work regardless.


Also, Richard Wright, the piano player for Pink Floyd not the writer, died today. Guys, my favorite band is quickly diminishing! Not cool!

Cooper-Young was fun. Saw several people I know. Hung out with some people I like. Got some new sunglasses and a Grateful Dead album. Also got drunk before 2pm. All in all, I'd say it was a good day! I've needed good days lately.

I'm going to NY in December. Found out today, if the money works out, I *may* get to go to Cali in October. Both coasts in one semester...oh please! Oh please! Oh please!